I woke up yesterday morning in my rented London apartment in utter disbelief. Angry and confused. Messages poured in over social media in massive waves. Eerily familiar emotions to the morning after Britain voted to leave. The tube ride to work, however, was quite the antithesis. You couldn’t hear a whisper. No casual chit-chat. No anger. Just silence.
The news started to sink in. In the evening this article, posted by my good friend Shiri, popped up on my Facebook feed. It felt like a hard slap on my face. A slap I deserved needed.
First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.
-Gandhi
Now I know what it feels to be on the wrong side of that quote. Stings doesn’t it?
After both BREXIT and Trump I read numerous posts on my social feeds speculating how democracy failed us all. I am paraphrasing but…
“Direct democracy is scary.”
“The problem is with ‘old voters’ - young people have to suffer the consequences and their voices should be heard more.”
“Imagine if only the educated could vote.”
Stop. STOP. SERIOUSLY STOP!!!
I am sorry to point out, you are not losing faith in democracy. You are losing faith in humanity. Democracy is a process by which everyone’s voice is heard. The process is only as good as its participants. Real people. Flesh and blood. Like you and me. We sacrificed many things to give everyone a voice. EVERYONE. Don’t fuck it up now.
Trump did not win by chance. He won because of who he promised to be and what he promised to do. He may or may not have meant a word he said during his whole campaign. But that is not of consequence. The half of America who voted for him believes in those words and wants them to be true. That is what I am scared of. I am not scared of who Trump is and what he is capable of doing. I am scared of what the majority of people in his country want him to be and do.
There is no ‘them’. Repeat after me. There is no ‘them’. You want a world free of divisive lines (race, gender, religion, and borders)? Then stop saying ‘them’. Otherwise you are guilty of creating another divisive line. You can’t have it both ways. ‘They’ will exist as long as you continue to isolate ‘them’ and make ‘them’ the bad guys.
There may be a few bad people. Opportunistic scumbags. Politicians. Business men. But half of America isn’t that. Half of Britain isn’t that. The people who voted for Trump or BREXIT aren’t bad people. They weren’t born with hatred.
We all learn to hate because of the circumstances we grow up in. Because of what ideologies echoes around us. Yes, you are not going to transform every racist, sexist, homophobic, nationalistic, flag-waving, name-calling, religious book-thumping person into the open scientific-minded equal-right activist you want them to be. But learning to hate them or blame them for what is happening isn’t the solution. We exist under a huge class divide today that we refuse to acknowledge. We have all silently turned elitists. I am guilty much more than you. Stop the rhetoric. Stop making fun of them on social media. You are fueling a fire you cannot control. This is not good vs. bad. This is not the empire vs. the rebel alliance. There is no ‘us’ vs. ‘them’. ‘They’ are ‘us’. Most people who voted for Trump aren’t bad people, and you are not the protagonist of this story. Sorry to point out the obvious.
Class and economic divides have always existed. This is not new. I mean like forever. History repeats. The same story over and over. Each time (hopefully) getting a little better. You want change without going through another breakdown in world order? Let’s talk about how to bridge this gap.
London voted Remain. Major US cities voted for Hillary. Even our polls couldn’t find the right balance in demography. You want to breakout of the bubble? It won’t happen using your keyboard. It probably won’t even happen by talking to people in your neighborhood.
Don’t look at me. I know nothing about social reforms. I don’t have the answer.
I am an Atheist. Like I-wish-someday-there-will-be-no-religions-and-everybody-will-be-a-scientist kind of atheist. But I don’t know how to talk to a person of faith. Richard Dawkins is wrong if he thinks pointing out to someone why their beliefs are unfounded is the way to convert them to evidence-seeking individuals. Ask yourself why someone needs religion. Ask yourself why a good person would vote for Trump or BREXIT. Put yourself in their shoes. Imagine the life experiences they’ve had before you start calling them ‘wrong’. Religion gives people hope that things do not happen by chance and that ‘eventually’ justice will prevail. When politicians lie about the number of jobs they will create by building another wall it gives people hope. Who cares if the promises of religion or politicians are true? It still gives people hope. They believe because they desperately want to believe. If you want to have any chance changing what they believe in, then first find some other way to give them hope.
Today more than ever we need to remind ourselves what it means to be good and kind. Then let’s remind ourselves that people on the other side are also good and kind. Don’t build a wall between yourself and the people who want to build a wall. Be kind and understanding when it is the hardest to be kind and understanding. Otherwise you are just doing it when it suits you.
Protest every wrong you witness. Stand tall. I wish I was in New York right now. In the streets. With all my friends that I have tremendous respect for who’ve taken the streets. This is not about over-ruling a democratically elected leader. This about letting him know that good women and men are watching his every move and we will not stand for hatred.
Be mindful when you take the stand. Do not stand out of anger or despair. Stand out of love and humility. Don’t be angry at the people who voted for Trump or BREXIT. Empathize. Love. Smile. Because it is when we all start to hate each other that the hate-mongers win. Don’t let them win. Don’t let them take away our smiles, kindness, and friendships.
This ship has gone off course. Brace yourself and watch out for everyone around you. We are about to bring this ship back on course together.